Criminal Behaviours: Fisting

The word ‘fisting’ is deceptively violent. The act of fisting in sex is far less aggressive.

fisting-crashpad

Fisting is where someone gradually inserts their entire hand into their partner (or themselves) and can be performed on men and women alike. There are no sudden movements, it isn’t an act of aggression. How the hand moves (or doesn’t) is a matter of preference, like the difference between rough sex and gentle love-making.

In my experience fisting has been a slow process. It isn’t something that is part of my regular sexual activity, but rather something to enjoy with my partner on evenings where I’ve felt particularly aroused.

Trust is a huge part of fisting. For my partner to fist me, I have to relax and they have to go slow. It takes patience. It is a gradual build-up of fingers and a lot of lube. It isn’t aggressive at all; it’s one of the most intimate things I can experience with her.

When Sir fists me, it offers a rare moment of quiet. Our scenes are usually punctuated with strikes, and cries of either pleasure or pain. Being fisted as a submissive is different. He is quiet with concentration, I’m almost silent with fear and excitement. His hands are strong, I know the aggression he is capable of. He could hurt me with the slightest movement of his hand when doing this. Sir is gentle with me, he continuously checks to see if I’m ok. It is an act of complete trust. It’s also really hot.

Fisting Day was set up by porn performers Jiz Lee and Courtney Trouble in 2011. Rather than being the latest Hallmark holiday, Fisting Day aims to tackle this widespread censorship, to tackle the myth that fisting – an act globally censored in pornography – is inherently painful, obscene or wrong.

The day, held on 21st October, welcomes contributions from bloggers, journalists, film makers and other fisting enthusiasts.

“I do not think [fisting] is disgusting or offensive,” says co-founder and genderqueer porn performer Jiz Lee. “Many people think sex in and of itself is obscene.”

Lee discovered fisting in their twenties. They describe their love of fisting in  their blog, which you can enjoy in its entirety. With such a positive description from Lee, it is hard to understand why fisting has such a bad representation.

“Some people think fisting is intense in a bad way — that it hurts,” Lee writes. “But anyone who loves fisting knows that it can be the most intimate and beautifully connecting experience with a lover. [It] isn’t any more scary than any kind of unwelcome sexual advance.”

Fisting does not carry a higher risk of harm. All sex acts can be weaponised fisting can be conceived as violent, but so can missionary heterosexual penetrative sex.

Lee adds deeming one consensual sex act more acceptable than another “creates an unhealthy limitation on the diversity of human sexuality.”

The ban compromises the freedom of speech amongst UK porn producers. The legislation may even impact on an individual level.

“To restrict the depiction of a sex act means the possibility to restrict the sex act itself,” Lee explains.

Jiz Lee

Jiz Lee

The laws do not directly affect Lee, who is an American performer but they have worked in the UK before and now feel constrained by our country’s laws.

“I’ve only shot once in the UK, with Petra Joy. The film is(S)he Comes, and it features a scene where I ejaculate.” Lee expressed some concern about the ejaculation, and the absurdity of worrying about it at all!

“It feels ridiculous to be concerned about it, especially considering the feminist platform of it’s director.”

Fisting is intimate, however unconventional it may seem. For those who enjoy it, the question of violence is so far removed from the act that it’s aggressive moniker belies the pleasure and satisfaction it can offer.

Many thanks to Jiz Lee for their contribution to this blog post. Follow Jiz Lee on Twitter and check out their website here.

One thought on “Criminal Behaviours: Fisting

  1. Pingback: Twelfth Post – Happy Birthday Porn Protest! | Written by Jenny

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